Monday, January 16, 2006

"Did You Take An Awkward Pill?"

Great line from the West Wing last night. Now that I finally have my Tivo back up and running, I'm trying to catch up on some of my favorite shows.

So my weekend has been a futile quest for love or lust amongst the leather and latex set that gathered in DC for the weekend for MAL. I wandered among the various fetish booths at the hotel and then hung out at the bar trying to see what trouble I could find. But put that many gay men in a single location and it's like you've just dumped 1000 children into Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. Why have the chocolate bar, when you never know what new devilish chocolate delight will be around the corner. And it's not like gay men aren't ADD when it comes to sex anyways. Jimbo's description from last year is spot on.

While I want a BF (boy friend), I'm willing to settle for a FB (f*&kbuddy, or as we say in polite company, "a friend with benefits") for now. But every time I go to one of these events, it reminds me why I'm not into any of the normal gay scenes. I'm too old and out of shape to be a circuit boy, not to mention unwilling/unable to partake of the requisite party drugs. I'm too cute and normal and usually clean shaven to be in the leather scene. While I saw lots of hot muscle guys with tatoos that would definitely fit the bill for FB's, it's all of the red, yellow, and brown hankies and stripes on their leather that scares me off. I'm definitely not into that. And don't even get me started on the guys with welts on their back. Ugh.

So basically I am the Goldilocks of the gay scene, looking for the one that's just right, but trying them all, just in case.

I did don what leather I had and went to the big dance last night at Nation. It was packed and surprisingly enough, the music had a lot of vocals to it. Which was nice for a change. I did have a good time and I will say it was a friendlier crowd than usual. Unfortunately I only ran into people I've met before and didn't want to see again. That's my luck.

The ironic moment of the night is when Fergie starts singing about her lovely lady lumps to a cavernous room full of hot half naked gay men. To give Chris Cox some props, toward the end of the mix, he did manage to dub in "hairy manly nuts." And even more ironically, I think I like Fergie's version better.

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