Mind-Funk
So I got into a really bad funk yesterday. Well, really it's been building for a couple of days. Work is stressing me out big time. First of all, why do people insist on trying to cram five days worth of work into a four day week? What's the point of a holiday if you're going to kill yourself when you come back. And I've got so much work to do that I don't know where to start. And that semi-paralysis means the work is piling up more and that only stresses me out more.Then I had to go into the hospital for a FNA and was feeling kind of sorry for myself. It's probably nothing, but it felt weird and just didn't contribute to my great mood yesterday.
So I bail from work early (which sadly means I put in only 8 hours) and go home to just lay down. Which doesn't help. So I try to eat my way through my emotions. I say try because apparently the "Everything but Mushrooms" pizza I ordered from Stoney's included anchovies. Egads! Well, the pizza was ruined. Even after I had picked off the evil little fishes, it was still inedible. I had one piece and thought I was going to hurl. I did managed to suck down some cookies from Whole Foods, so I had that whole bloating thing going for me.
I try to work some more, but I'm basically in shut down mode mentally. So I crank up my Tivo and watch some Stargate Atlantis. Which is some nice mind candy. In one of the episodes I watched, one of the characters needs to relax, to meditate, so he can "ascend" or else he dies. And he can't. He's your type A to the T and after laying down for a milli-second he bolts up and says, "I can't let go!" And wow, I'm so there. And I know it's not healthy at all.
Anyways, the funny thing is that this AM I woke up and I actually felt okay. Not stressed out, not wigging about the gazillion things I've got to do. Just sort of calm. Maybe I'm in a weird state of denial. Maybe I'm in the eye of the storm and it will pass and I'll be back in the maelstrom of my life. I'm not sure. But in the meantime, I'm just going to go with the flow and see how long it lasts.
Care to take any bets?
posted by Trey @ 7:29 AM
1 Comments:
you *did* sound somewhat "off" that day...perhaps one of those yummy "Whole Foods" chlorophyl shakes (made from their juice-bar's tiny lawn grass snipped with scissors as you watch!! LOL!!)...gag! when I'm in such rotten moods, I try to find a decent DVD, tape or show that has really GOOD stand-up or ensemble comedy of the edgy variety. the belly laughs usually do the trick. otherwise, if you're that far-gone, time to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" again. granted, it's NOT Christmas yet. but George Bailey and A2C Clarence Oddbody usually put me back on track. Of course, there's always ZuZu's petals!!! (sniff)
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